Southern Comfort
by Ponies are Cool
Summary: Helen Parr's parents come all the way from Georgia and some crazy antics ensue. This is a one shot about having pride in your roots. Excuse the generalized Southern accents and the terrible translations of foreign languages; Google is only so good.


This is going to be my first attempt at "The Incredibles" fanfiction. Man, do I love this movie. It ranks up there with_ Bram Stoker's Dracula, Men in Black, Jurassic Park, _and _O Brother, Where Art Thou? _Currently, I'm in the process of writing another fanfiction epic, "His Number is 626", along with some college work, so I'm a little busy.

Go easy on me; I don't have long until I'm finished with my semester.

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own any of the following characters: Bob Parr, Helen Parr, Violet, Dash, Jack-Jack or any characters from either Pixar or Disney.

However, the made up characters are mine, along with the dialogue and the crazy antics.

* * *

"Bob, you're not planning on wearing that, are you?"

Helen Parr, once known as the flirtatious and independent "Elastigirl", the same heroine who promised never to settle down, or take the sacred matrimonial vows, was now telling her husband what to wear. She never imagined herself in the role of a mother when she was younger; there was even a time when she considered motherhood as an unnecessary obstacle, and she was always amazed at independent women sacrificing their dreams to raise a family. Was there any adventure in raising children? Any glory in settling down and living the American Dream, complete with a white picket fence and a backyard? When Helen was younger, she would have never considered marriage or family life. They were unnecessary to someone who was at their peak in the superhero realm. However, as time passed, and she finally hung up her costume for an apron, she found out that motherhood was more of a challenge than fighting crime. Telling a crook to drop some old lady's purse or stopping a nuclear meltdown turned out to be elementary, compared to easing an angsty teenage daughter and medicating a hyperactive son.

It turned out that Helen was wrong about parenthood; it _was_ an adventure. The only thing more challenging than being a mother, was telling her husband how to dress properly.

"Honey," Bob replied, "it's just a dinner. It's not the end of the world if I wear a _nice _polo shirt with my good pair of khakis."

"It's not just a dinner, Bob," Helen replied, "it's a formal one. You're supposed to look nice at formal dinners."

"I do look nice!"

"You would, if your shirt wasn't so wrinkled!"

Bob looked down at his shirt. "It's not wrinkled," he said, "it's just...uh -"

"Just what?"

There was a long pause. "I'll go change," Bob finally replied.

_You better go change,_ thought Helen.

Today was a very important day for Helen. This was the day when she would again see her parents after so many years. The last time she saw her parents was when Violet was a baby. This was when her children would see their grandparents for the first time; the dinner _had _to be perfect. To her, this wasn't just a formal dinner...this was a reunion, a time where her family could enjoy each other's company, where everyone could talk and get along. Therefore, everything had to be perfect.

Dash and Violet came out of their rooms as best dressed as possible. Violet was wearing a light pink gown, her hair adorned with a red ribbon. Her shoes were a light, sandy color. Dash had on white, long-sleeved shirt, a black tie, and black dress pants with matching shoes. Some would say that he looked rather "dashing". Helen herself was wearing a white gown, decorated with colorful flowers.

Helen smiled. "Both of y'all look so nice," she said. "Dash, I think your father needs to take fashion lessons from you."

"Wait," said Violet, "did you just say _y'all_? I could've sworn you did."

"Yeah, she said it," said a voice from behind them. It was Bob, dressed almost exactly like Dash, except for the tie. Having a tie around his muscular neck would have caused him severe discomfort, so he left it off.

"Your mom and her parents are from Georgia," continued Bob. "When your mom came up here on her own to fight crime, the superheroes teased her about the way she spoke. So, doing what any normal person would do in her position, she ditched the accent and learned to speak like the other heroes." The entire time her husband was speaking, Helen was arbitrarily occupying herself with an unknown task, trying to block the painful reminder from her head.

Bob leaned in closer to his children.

"She's still a little ashamed of the whole situation," he whispered.

"Bob," Helen said, turning around from the kitchen sink. "That's a little rude; I'm right here. And I a'int - " Helen clenched her fist and closed her eyes. She inhaled through her nose, exhaled through her mouth. She opened her eyes again, more relaxed, but still a little irked. "I'm_ not _ashamed of what happened to me. Let bygones be bygones."

"Huh?" asked Dash.

"It means 'let it go'," said Bob. "Now come on, you know the rules; mom cooks, we set the table."

"And clean the dishes," said Helen, now smiling.

* * *

It didn't take long for the Parr family to set the table. The only thing that kept them from eating, was waiting for Helen's parents. About ten minutes passed.

"When are they getting here?" asked Dash. "I'm hungry."

"It's only for a few more minutes," replied his mother, "now hush."

Bob, who was silent the entire time, now had a sudden revelation. "Were we supposed to pick your parents up from the airport?"

"No Bob," said Helen, "we weren't. My dad's a pretty independent man; he likes the whole 'DIY' approach."

"Oh, that's right," said Bob. "I forgot that they're driving up here."

"All the way from Georgia?" asked Dash.

"No son," said Bob, chuckling at his son's naivete, "from the airport."

"Old people are _driving_?!" blurted Violet. "They're going to_ drive _here?"

Helen spoke up this time. "Young lady, they are your grandparents."

"Yeah, but they're still old!"

"Violet Jean Parr," said Helen in the sternest possible voice, "stop generalizing people! It's rude. Saying that all old people are bad drivers is like saying, 'all teenagers have no manners', or 'all cityfolk are rude', or 'all Southern people are rednecks who -" Helen stopped in mid-speech. She stopped her tirade, realizing that she was going to bring up some repressed memories from her glory days as a Super. Her family was looking at her, surprised at the sudden outburst. Violet quickly, but timidly, apologized.

"I'm sorry, mom," she said. "I didn't mean to make fun of Grandma and Grandpa."

"No," said Helen, pulling off a smile, "it's okay. Besides, Grandpa's eyesight _is _a little bad."

The Parr family chuckled a little, but it wasn't a true chuckle. It was the kind of chuckle that someone does when an awkward situation took place; the awkward situation when it is obvious that one of the party was offended, yet no one else acknowledged it for fear of it escalating. So, to make up for the offensive gesture or words, someone provides comic relief. However, the sudden contrast only tenses up the situation. Such was the case with Helen.

* * *

_DING-DONG._

Finally, after what seemed like an eon, Mrs. Parr's parents arrived. Everyone in the room instantly perked up and shed their anxieties, hoping that their guests would not notice their internal strife. After all, this was a time for first impressions, and first impressions _are_ important.

"I'll get it!" exclaimed Dash, rushing to the door. He opened it to reveal a short, chubby Asian child, the same age as himself. It was Russell: their next door neighbor, the Adventure Scout.

"Hey Russell," said Dash. "What's up?"

" Hey Dash, have you seen Dug?" he asked. "He's missing and I'm really starting to worry about him."

"Well," said Dash, "I think I saw him in Mr. Lewis's yard, playing in Mrs. Lewis's flowerbed. But that was about an hour ago; he could had left by now."

"Okay Dash," said Russell, "I'll ask them if they know where he went. Thanks anyway." Russell jogged backwards, waving to Dash as he did so. Bob walked up to the door to see what was going on with his son.

"Was that Russell?" asked Bob.

"Yeah," said Dash, "Dug's missing again."

"That dog is _so_ wound up," said Bob. "Now come on. Let's get inside and wait for your grandparents."

As soon as Bob Parr finished his sentence, a white, 1962 Impala rolled passed their house and eased itself into the driveway. A man of enormous build - almost the size of Bob - exited the driver's side of the car and went around the front to open up the passenger's door. He was wearing a tan suit with brown shoes to match. His spiked hair was gray, with specks of black scattered around his head. A pair of spectacles rested on his pointed nose, while his clean-shaven face glistened in the sunlight.

"Go on inside," Bob motioned to Dash. "They're here."

Dash closed the door behind him, leaving Bob alone to greet the guests. He walked toward them and reached out his right hand toward the male.

"It's good to see you again, Mr. Fallon," Mr. Parr said.

The man turned around and smiled at Bob, shaking his hand. Even Bob had a hard time shaking this man's hand, on account of his grip being so powerful.

"Well, look atchu!" he said. "Mah daughtah's cookin' musta been real good if you turned out lahk thee-iss!"

Bob chuckled. "I'm missed you too, sir."

Mr. Fallon let out an obnoxious laugh. A friendly, but obnoxious, laugh. "Aw shucks, Bob. You kin call me Jayuck; Ah toldja that when we fahrst met! Now come on an' be a gentleman an' help the Misses out the car!"

Bob complied and took Jack Fallon's spot as doorman for Mrs. Fallon. He opened the door to a beautiful woman who did not look her age, her grey hair being the only hint of her time on earth. She looked exactly like Helen, but aged a little more. A pair of spectacles sat on the tip of her nose too, while a small beauty mark rested on her left cheek. Her dress was white and form-fitting; she had gloves to match. Mrs. Fallon looked as though she was on her way to church.

Bob took her hand and helped her out of the car. "Thank ya kindly, Robert," she said. "It's nice to know thayut awr lil' Helen has murried such a fine mayun."

"Oh, call me 'Bob', Mrs. Fallon, " replied Bob.

"I'll start callin' you 'Bob'," she said, "as soon as you start callin' me Jean. We're all related here; no need fer formalities."

* * *

Bob opened the door for his in-laws, leading them into a lovely dinner scene, complete with a decorated table, matching china, and even a cornucopia resting in the center of the table. Dash, Viloet, and Jack-Jack sat around the table dressed in their finest clothes, patiently - or not - waiting to begin eating.

Helen stood up from the table and went over to hug her parents. She gave both of them a kiss. "Mom, Dad," she said, "it's so good that you could come. It's been such a long time, too long -"

"Why Helen!" said Mrs. Fallon. "Where on earth did yer accent go?"

"Well," started Helen, "living in the city will do that to you. I've been living here for a while, and I've, well...assimilated."

"But no matter what," said her dad, "you'll always be that lil' Jawjah peach. Won'tcha?"

"Yeah, of course," replied Helen quickly, hiding her uneasiness to answer. Her parents suspected something was wrong for a split-second, but they quickly brushed the feeling off. This was a family dinner, and neither of them wanted to interrupt the happiness with any negative feelings. Her mother spoke up to break whatever uncomfortable feelings were left.

"C'mon," she said, smiling, "are we gonna have dinner or not? Ah'm a lil' hungry."

* * *

Mr. and Mrs. Fallon sat down at the table, while their daughter went to grab the food. She came back, carrying an enormous roast with a carving knife protruding from the middle. Helen set it down, then sat down next to her husband.

"The side dishes ain't -" she quickly stopped, then recuperated. "The side dishes _aren't _done yet. We'll have to enjoy some roast before we have any beans or mashed potatoes."

"That's just fahn by me," said Mr. Fallon. "_**Is féidir liom fanacht**_."

Violet went wide-eyed upon hearing a foreign language. She understood that in her parents line of work, some languages would have to be learned, but_ this _language was something completely different. It sounded like gibberish to her, but it was a lovely gibberish. Violet had to hear more of this.

"Whoa," she said, "what did you just say?"

"He said that he can wait, Vi," Helen said to her daughter.

"Yeah, but what was _that_?"

"It was Gaelic. Irish Gaelic, actually."

"I thought they spoke English in Ireland," blurted Dash.

"They do," replied Helen, "but Gaelic is their main language."

"So," started Dash, turning to his grandparents, "are you from Georgia or Ireland?"

Mr. and Mrs. Fallon giggled upon hearing the question. "We're from Jawjah," said Mrs. Fallon, "but alotta awr kinfolk are from Arrland; yer great-grandaddy on mah husband's side included. Yer mamma speaks it too."

Violet and Dash turned to their mother. "Can you really speak like that, mom?" asked Violet. "I kinda want to hear it."

"Oh, I don't know," said Helen. "It's been so long; I might have forgotten some of it."

"Please, mom," begged Dash. "_P__leeease?"_

Helen sighed. She focused her eyes upward and to the right, showing that she was thinking heavily. "What do you want me to say?"

"Anything!" said Violet, anxiously. "Say: I was born in Georgia."

"Alright," said Helen. "_**Rugadh mé in Georgia**_."

"That's it?" asked Dash. "Come on, mom! What else can you say?"

Helen thought for a minute. She snapped her fingers when she was done thinking. "I've got it," she said. "_**Mura bhfuil tú ag ithe gach rud ar do pláta, tá tú chun a phionósú ar feadh seachtaine**_."

Dash giggled. "That's funny," he said, "but what does it mean?"

"Well," started Helen, "let's just say that you'd better eat everthing on your plate, unless you like your room _that _much."

Dash's face dropped. His mom and his grandparents giggled. Violet decided to take a risk at being scolded in a foreign language.

"You have to admit, mom," Violet said giggling, "it _is _kinda funny. You know, the way you spoke and all..." Violet started to trail off when her mother shot her a warning glance. It didn't matter if her parents were here, because Helen would still exercise her parental authority over her children.

"Aww," said Jack Fallon, "lighten up on the kee-ids. They was just kiddin' around."

Mrs. Fallon changed the subject. "So, whose goin' t'say grace?"

"Aww heck," said Mr. Fallon, "Ah know whatcher hintin' at." He addressed everbody at the table. "Alright, everyone grab the hand of the parson next t'you an' bow yer heads. Includin' the baby. Can't leave him out."

Everyone at the table obeyed. Mr. Fallon began to say grace.

_**"Bless us, O Lord! and these Thy gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty, through Christ our Lord.  
Amen."**_

"That's it?" asked Violet. "That's all you had to say?"

"Ah'm perty sure the Lawd understands thayut were hungry," said Mr. Fallon to his granddaughter. Oh, an' speakin' of the Lawd, can ya say yer rosary for me an' Gramma?"

"My what?" Violet asked.

"You know," Mr. Fallon said, "Hail Mary, full of grace...can ya recite yer rosary?"

Violet tried to open her mouth to say something, but she was completely unable to do so. She looked across the table to her mom, as if to ask for support in such an awkward situation. Her mother gently encouraged her, as if she was saying,_ It's all right. You can do this; you know it! _Violet, barely remembering the small prayer, did her best to bluff her way through.

"Uh, Hail Mary, full of grace," she began. "The Lord is with...thee? Blessed art thou amongst, uh, women and...and blessed is thy fruit of the womb, Jesus...I'm sorry, Grandpa, I can't do this. I don't even know_ what _I believe. Besides, mom and dad had us go to a Lutheran church. It's _kinda _like a Catholic church...except the nuns."

Mr. and Mrs. Fallon were a little surprised at their grandchild not being able to recite something so important to them. Not being able to recite the rosary was up there on the list of Catholic no-no's, along with Protestantism, Freemasonry, and giving up church for Lent. However, the shocked look on the Fallons' faces quickly turned to smiles.

"Oh, it don't matter if ya cain't say yer rosary," said Grandpa Fallon. "We still love ya. The Lawd wouldn't be too happy if we got upset at awr granddaughter's not-knowin' of the rosary prayer."

"Don't matter what ya believe," chimed in Grandma Fallon. "The Good Book says that all will come to know the Lawd. Besides, a loving God will always care for his creations."

"Amen," said Bob, smiling. He looked over at his wife to see if she wanted a say in the discussion. He expected a small smile, or a little grin at her parents open-mindedness, but instead he saw his wife with her head cocked to the side, twirling her hair; a nervous tic that she had. The taboo conversation of religion between her Catholic parents and her pseudo-deist/agnostical daughter had her completely edgy. Bob, trying to ease her anxiety, brought up a completely different topic.

"Hey Helen," he said aloud. "Are the side dishes done yet? We could use some mashed potatoes with this roast!"

Helen slowly turned her head towards Bob to tell him to keep his mouth shut, thinking that he was being obnoxious. Instead, she saw her husband mouthing something like, _It'll take your mind off of this religious talk_. Helen quickly figured out what her husband was trying to say and she complied.

"Oh," she said, "let me check."

She stood up from her chair and went over to the crockpots sitting on the counter. She lifted the lid to one of them, steam billowing out of it like clouds from an industrial town in 1800s England. She turned to her family.

"Alright everyone," she said, "the side dishes are done. Y'all can come up now and get your food."  
Helen cringed after realizing that her accent was slipping through. She didn't want this accent anymore. She didn't even want to be associated with the Southern culture or lifestyle anymore. Helen loved her parents, but even her strong love for them could not rid herself of this seemingly disgusting curse; she might as well have been Cain, wandering around in the land of Nod, asking God Almighty to do away with this affliction. After all of the ridicule the other superheroes gave her, she couldn't stand to be what she was...what she is. Her mind was in a permanent state of cognative dissonance, angry at living a lie and rejecting her roots, yet caving in to the standards of "normal speech".

Helen walked back to her seat in a trance, not noticing her family getting up to stand in line, laughing and enjoying themselves. Everyone was grabbing food, giving friendly pushes, and taking food off of each other's plates. If only she could join them. If only she could be a part of their happy world. She _wanted _to, but she was holding herself back.

Everyone finally finished piling food on their plates and sat down. Bob looked over at Helen. "Honey, aren't you going to get some food?"

Helen had a blank expression on her face. She didn't speak. Bob tried to get her attention again. "Honey? You okay?"

"Hmmm? What?" asked Helen coming out of her daze. "Wha- yeah, Ah'm -" she cut herself off again upon hearing her voice slip back into a Southern accent. "_I'm _fine. I just zoned out a little and yes I'm going to get some food because I'm hungry and I'm..." She rose out of her seat. "I'm going," she said. She said all of this very quickly, trying to hide her agitation. Helen went to the counter and began to grab some food. Her parents, Bob, and Violet were the only ones who knew that something was annoying her; Dash was only concerned with his food, while Jack-Jack just gurgled and made random noises. Jack, her father, tried to make light conversation with his agitated daughter.

"So, Helen," Jack Fallon said, "Why did it take ya so long ta tell us that you was a superhero? It's nice t'know thayut awr daughtah is a crahm-fightin' - "

"You '_were' _a superhero," Helen said, nonchalantly cutting the roast on her plate.

"Ah beg yer pardon?" said her father, a little confused. He chuckled a little bit. "I wudn't no superhero!"

"I know, Dad," said Helen. "I was just correcting you. You see, you said, _'Why did it take you so long to tell us that you __was__ a superhero?' _The correct way to say that sentence is, _'Why did it take you so long to tell us that you __were__ a superhero?' _Otherwise, if you don't say that, it's just bad English."  
She continued to cut her roast, placing some of it in her mouth as she did, looking down the entire time while her parents, Bob, and Violet looked at her, completely stunned. Even Dash, who was stuffing his mouth the entire time, suspecting that something was not right.

"Oh," said her dad, quite humiliated. "I beg yer pardon. I didn't know you was - I beg yer pardon _again_ - I didn't know you were also an Anglish major; I apologize fer mah ignernce of the rules of proper speakin'."

"It's okay, Dad," said Helen, still looking down at her roast. "I'm not trying to be rude or anything, but it's just the way it is up here. You know, in the city and all..."

"Oh, it's fahn by me," said her father, trying to cover up the shame imposed upon him by his own daughter. "Ah just wudn't aware of such thangs."

"No, it's perfectly acceptable, Dad," replied Helen. "I'm sure that a lot of people have the same problems that we're having right now; I was only correcting your grammar to...well, I'm sure you know what I mean."

The entire room was engulfed by an awkward silence. Everbody was waiting for that one trigger word that word set off an entire verbal war; no longer did anyone ask if something would happen...it was absolutely, without a doubt, a question of when. When will this situation become too much for everybody present? When will the powder keg blow up in everyone's face? When? Apparently, it was very soon.

"No, Ah'm not entirely sure of what you were getting at," said Mr. Fallon. "What were you gonna say?"

"Don't end your sentences in 'at'," muttered Helen to herself.  
"Anyway, I only wanted you to use proper grammar, because it's...well," she sighed. "I just don't want you and Mom to sound like uneducated white trash. I mean, I know you two; you raised me to what I am now, you - "

The look on Mr. Fallon's face was one that was worthy to be put in the Book of Revelation. No one would have ever thought it possible for such a relaxed and caring man to be capable of such a fear-envoking glare. He cut Helen off before she offended him and his wife any further.

"What did you call us?" he asked his daughter, nostrils flaring. "Did you accuse us of being _white trash_?"

"What?" asked Helen. "No, I only said that I don't want you and Mom to sound like white trash! It's just that you have to learn proper grammatical skills; I'm not accusing you of being anything!" She focused her attention on her mother. "Mom," she said, "can you explain to Dad that I'm -"

"Helen," said her mom, "you think thayut yer Father is stupid?_ 'Can you explain to Dad?' _Wh-what is that, Helen? You think we're stupid?"

"What, no! Ah'm - I mean - _I'm_ just telling you that speaking properly is nothing to be ashamed of!"

"And Ah'm assumin' thayut speakin' like this is somethang to be ashamed of?" asked her father, purposely stretching out his Southern twang. "That showing some pride - or at the very least, RESPECT - in where ya came from is somethin' to be embarassed about?!"

"Dad, you're overreacting; I'm proud of where Ah - I,_ I_ - came from, and I'm only giving you a small English lesson! How many times do I have to keep defending myself from you two? Goodness, what is it with you people?"

Accusing her parents of poor grammar did not turn out to be the trigger wood that everyone was expecting. In fact, the trigger words turned out to be words used all the time, especially in movies: _you people._ Yes, these words may seem like a harmless cliché in a Hollywood film, but they most certainly have an impact on people in real life when used in the same context.

Mr. Fallon raised his voice. "You people? _You people?! _Now yer lumpin' all of us Southern folks into the same category? Helen, yer not only sayin' that we speak like white trash, but yer sayin' that we are white trash! Livin' in this here city musta done you up real good, because Ah can't even recognize mah own daughtah! It's like this place musta turned ya into one of them snobs that looks down on everybody, settin' rules fer people an' tellin' 'em what's 'proper' an' what's 'not'! If you wanna accuse all Southern people of bein' one thang an' one thang only...well, then I s'pose it takes one to know one! And if we're white trash, then awr offspring ain't nothin' special either! This is how we speak, Helen! This is how a good amount of people speak...like white trash."

Helen, now submerged in complete anger at her father's words, no longer made any attempt to hide her accent. She wasn't even sure that she even had her full accent anymore, after years of it laying dormant, but right now, she didn't care. She didn't care about who was at the table, or who heard her, or what the outcome would be. All she cared about at this point was getting her point across to her muleheaded parents. At this point, she wasn't humiliated at how she used to sound. Helen only wanted to make herself heard, no matter what the costs.

"Well that's just real mature, Dad," she said. "Ah don't know how many parents go 'round tellin' their kin that they're a buncha dumb rednecks!"

"Ah didn't say you was anythang! _You_ were the one who's sittin' high-n-mighty on yer throne, tellin' yer own blood that they cain't speak properly!"

"Ya cain't speak properly, Dad! That's all that Ah was tellin' you! I just wanted you to an' Ma to fit in! To be...normal!"

"Normal? NORMAL? Since when do you know about normal? Who are you to judge what's normal?! Since when did awr lil' independent 'Ah-don't-care-about-how-Ah-sound' daughter, decide to give up on herself?!"

"Ah didn't give up on mahself, Ah just..."  
Helen couldn't speak anymore. Her father was right. She _had_ given up on herself. Ditching her accent in favor of being liked _was_ giving up. Helen slumped back down into her chair, the sounds of an upset Jack-Jack filling the dining room. Dash started to console the crying baby, while Grandma Fallon, Bob, and Violet sat in their chairs, looking down at their plates.

"Mom," Violet said, "I don't care where you came from; you're still my mom and that's all that matters."

"Violet speaks for us all, honey," said Bob. "I knew about your background when we were still fighting crime in colored spandex; I heard the others make fun of you; heck, I even heard you a few times practicing to get rid of your accent. But none of that matters, Helen. What matters is us: this family. We don't care about how you sound...we care about you."

"Yeah!" said Dash, who successfully calmed down Jack-Jack. "To tell you the truth, I think that everybody talks funny to everybody else!"

"Ah think thatchu have a point," said Helen, tears running down her face. "Ah guess that we're all a lil' different to e'erbody else. And with that said, Ah's like to apologize to you, Mom and Dad. Can ya forgive yer own daughtah?"

Mr. and Mrs. Fallon smiled at Helen. "What kind of parents would we be if we didn't apologize to yew?" asked Mrs. Fallon.

* * *

The Fallons stayed at the Parr's house for about a week, when they had to return home. everybody kissed and hugged each other, made their peace, and wished the Fallons well, before they had to leave for Georgia. In that week, Violet learned some useful phrases (as well as some curse words) in Gaelic; Dash was giving a history lesson about numerous events in American history, which he was surprisingly interested in; and Bob and Helen received the Fallon's blessing to visit them anytime. Despite the uncomfortable start to Helen's parent's stay, all went smoothly, and on a lesser note, Dug was found by Grandpa Fallon. It was quite a shock for Jack to find out that the dog could talk, but even that didn't dampen Mr. Fallon's spirits. In fact, he asked Dug some questions (innapropriate ones, Mrs. Fallon said) like: 'Why do dogs eat feces?' and 'Why do dogs lick themselves at the most inopportune times?' To which Dug replied: 'Because it tastes good.' and 'You would do the same thing too, if you were able to.'

Most importantly, Helen learned to be proud of her heritage and who she was as a person. She was most definitely a mom, a hero, a loyal spouse, and a Southern belle.


End file.
